Quotes by David Letterman

David Michael Letterman is an American television host, comedian, writer, and producer. He hosted late night television talk shows for 33 years, beginning with the February 1, 1982, debut of Late Night with David Letterman on NBC, and ending with the May 20, 2015, broadcast of Late Show with David Letterman on CBS.

The best Quotes and Sayings

People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.

New York CityDavid Letterman
 
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Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger.

War, WeaponsDavid Letterman
 
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President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

David Letterman
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The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves.

David Letterman
 
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If it wasn't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsover.

CoffeeDavid Letterman
 
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There is no off position on the genius switch.

David Letterman
 
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I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.

David Letterman
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Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

New York CityDavid Letterman
 
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USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.

David Letterman
 
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Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.

Los AngelesDavid Letterman
 
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