The best Quotes by Dan Castellaneta

The best Quotes by Dan Castellaneta

Daniel Louis Castellaneta (born October 29, 1957) is an American actor, comedian, and writer. He is best known for voicing Homer Simpson on the animated series The Simpsons (as well as other characters on the show such as Abraham "Grampa" Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Sideshow Mel, Groundskeeper Willie, Mayor Quimby, and Hans Moleman).

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
It's the weirdest thing. When you go into acting, you expect to be a huge star and to be recognized... It did happen, but not in the way you expect it to... In L.A., I'm just another character actor.
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
I've made a kind of pact with myself where I said, It doesn't matter what it is as long as I'm acting.
I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think that Homer is all that I do.

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To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems!
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 8 Episode 18
If I didn't have this gun, the king of England could walk right in here and start pushing you around.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 9 Episode 5
This is America. Anyone can eat what they want, as long as they eat too much.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 24 Episode 5
I am so smart, I am so smart! S-M-R-T!
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 5 Episode 3
No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kids with fake IDs.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 8 Episode 10
All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.
This room is like a museum of old, useless crap... by which I mean every museum.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 24 Episode 4
Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 14 Episode 2
Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.
Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 5 Episode 18
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achille's heel, if you will.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene'.
Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.
If you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every day and do it really half a-sed. That's the American way.
My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a p-rn star!
Abraham Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 9 Episode 19
Where's the "any key"? Hm... I think I order a "tab".
Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well… all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay!
Ooh, the Patriot Act is so terrible! The government might find out what library books I take out! What's next, finding out what operas I go to?
Homer: "Do you want the job done right or do you want it done fast?"
Marge: "Well, like all Americans… fast!"
Good things don't end with "eum", they end with "mania" or "teria".
We home school 'em. I teach the big ones, and the big ones teach the little ones, but nobody taught me, so the whole thing is an exercise in futility.
Cletus Spuckler in The Simpsons - Season 18 Episode 14
When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power. Like God must feel when he's holding a gun.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 9 Episode 5
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life.
Number 1: "Cover for me."
Number 2: "Oh, good idea, Boss!"
Number 3: "It was like that when I got here."
You know what they say about Chicago. If you don't like the weather, wait fifteen minutes.
Why are there so many Latina's in Illinois?
Because that's where the Chica go.
Take me away, like I overdosed on cocaine
Or take me away like a bullet from Kurt Cobain, suicide
I'm from a windy city like Do or Die
The Game - My Life, Album: LAX
You can leave Chicago, but it will never leave you.
Village idiot? Hello, Chicago is a city, not a village, and the best city in the world!
Lydia Berman in Thunder Force
Looking at Chicago from outside the city in daylight is one of the most depressing sights in the world.
Neo Tribes in Cyberpunk 2077
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a flight to Illinois - and that's pretty much the same thing.
On victory, you deserve beer.
On defeat, you need it.
In heaven there's no beer, so let's just drink it here.

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Homer SimpsonThe SimpsonsChicagoIllinoisBeerMarge SimpsonCletus SpucklerAbraham SimpsonThe best Quotes and SayingsPeople