The best Quotes by Chris Raab

I'm Raab Himself and I'm a complete f*cking idiot!

Jackass

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In England, they drive on the left side of the road.
In Pennsylvania we drive on what's left of the road.

Pennsylvania

They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a flight to Pennsylvania - and that's pretty much the same thing.

Pennsylvania

Concussions aren't great, but as long as you have them before you're 50, it's cool. And Knoxville's 49, so we're good.

Jackass - Forever

Hi sweetie, I'm gonna inseminate you artificially... maybe for real if you play your cards right.

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass - to a cow

I think I'm a little concussed.

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass - The Movie

You don't matter... in fact, in about 20 seconds you're not even gonna be matter.

Bam Margera in Jackass

There's no such thing as a "pretty good" gator wrestler!

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass

They say Poland is the Mexico of Europe. I'm not sure of what that means, but I like it.

Chris Pontius in Jackass

Mexico Polen

Bam Margera: "Oh, dude! My f*cking tailbone is seriously broken! I'm not even kidding!"
Ryan Dunn: "He broke his tailbone! That's alright, we don't have tails anymore, what's the point of having one?"

Ryan Dunn in Jackass

Bam Margera

So, we've driven an hour north from Miami to Boca Raton, believe it or not, to film Steve-O jump into nine days worth of elephant poo.

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass

Steve-O

Did you see the way I stopped the beanbag with my stomach? That's instinct. You can't teach that!

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass

Now I know what it feels like to be my liver!

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass - getting doused with wine

Scott Potasnik: "You guys are gonna hate me an hour from now."
Johnny Knoxville: "We hate you already."

Johnny Knoxville in Jackass

Oh dude, you look like an egg with legs!

Bam Margera in Jackass - about his dad with a Elvis suit on

Since we no longer have to bleep cuss words, I promise I will get my mom to say, "f-" by the end of this movie.

Bam Margera in Jackass

Bam Margera: "Now these rocket skates are going to be a little different than the last."
Johnny Knoxville: "You using different bottle rockets?"
Bam Margera: "Nope. Just more of 'em."

Bam Margera in Jackass - The Movie

Whose d do I gotta suck to get some explosions around here?

Bam Margera in Jackass

I'm sick of the whole pooping thing... I'm gonna go get my butt cheeks pierced together.

Steve-O in Jackass

Ass Pooping

It's like when your parents said "I'm not mad at you, just disappointed." You know that hurt so much more.

Steve-O in Jackass

I am so glad I turned this idea down!

Steve-O in Jackass - The Movie

Hi, it's cold in Japan, so we're going to warm ourselves up with some fireworks.

Steve-O in Jackass

Hi, I'm Ryan Dunn, and I'm about to get the shit kicked out of me by a girl.

Ryan Dunn in Jackass - The Movie

Steve-O: "We wanted to see if you would run."
Ryan Dunn: "I'm not running anywhere with a toy car shoved up my butt."

Ryan Dunn in Jackass - The Movie

That guy right there is the best damn roller skater ever. Maybe even in the whole town.

Chris Pontius in Jackass

Hi, I'm Bunny the Lifeguard, any of these alligators try to ruin our swimming, I'm gonna wrestle them down, and probably have my way with them.

Chris Pontius in Jackass - The Movie

Johnny Knoxville: "Is this the worst you've ever had to go boom-boom?"
Dave England: "No man. I shit my pants at the fair."

Dave England in Jackass - The Movie

I'm seriously going to die right now.

Tony Hawk in Jackass

I conside skateboarding an art form, a lifestyle and a sport.

Tony Hawk

Skating

The best Quotes by Chris Raab

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