The best Quotes by Chelsea Handler

The best Quotes by Chelsea Handler

Chelsea Joy Handler (born February 25, 1975) is an American comedian, actress, writer, television host, and producer.

I was tortured, and probably half of it was deserved, but I was bullied - so much so that there were days when I was like, 'I can't go to school today.' I was too scared.
It's a pleasure to play my sister because everything I've accused her of my whole life, I can now re-enact before her eyes.
It's a dream come true to have someone else portray me. Because I've been living this life for a long time, and I'm over myself.
Don't think about anything for too long. Even if it's off-the-wall, go for it. You'll have a lot more fun in life.
Everything isn't permanent, so don't pretend that it is. Everything's supposed to move and shift.

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This is why you never go to New Jersey!
The results of a new study are out this week saying that New Jersey is one of the most livable states in the country. The study has a margin of error of 100 percent.
Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse, we gotta go to Jersey.
Hulk in What If…? - Season 1 Episode 4
I feel like if you're in Jersey, you have to be a Jersey Devils fan. Anybody born within the confines of the border of the state of New Jersey, I feel, should be a Jersey Devils fan.
The state of New Jersey is really two places - terrible cities and wonderful suburbs. I live in the suburbs, the final battleground of the American dream, where people get married and have kids and try to scratch out a happy life for themselves. It's very romantic in that way, but a bit naive. I like to play with that in my work.
Los Angeles traffic is just the worst thing in the world. It throws off timing so much. However, it's always warm and sunny. New Jersey has absolutely terrible weather, but the environment is really homey and chill.
You're asking me if I have any gum? That's like asking New Jersey if it has any sl-ts!
Max Black in 2 Broke Girls - Season 1 Episode 21
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a flight to New Jersey - and that's pretty much the same thing.
Perfection is impossible. In the 1,526 singles matches I played in my career, I won almost 80% of those matches. But what percentage of points did I win? 54%! In other words, even top ranked tennis players win barely more than half the points they play. When you lose every second point on average, you learn not to dwell on every shot.
Roger Federer - Juni 2024
We've had a lot of away games in the Champions League this season where we've heard the fans. When I think of the game in Newcastle, where you can hear our fans the whole time, even though it was said beforehand that Newcastle is the loudest stadium in England – that's really saying something. We are looking forward to our fans, they will deliver again in Paris.
I felt like a child amongst all the established players. First of all I had to prove myself in training and earn respect and over several months show what I was capable of.
Florian Wirtz - July 2021
Recently, on my 18th birthday, my mother showed me a note from my time at primary school. We had to write down what we wanted to be. The only thing I'd written was: football player. I really did always want that and started early on to kick everything I came across: balloons, balls and anything else lying around the house. There was a lot flying about at our place.
Florian Wirtz - July 2021
Your mom's so fat, even in Minecraft she appears round.

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