Quotes from Breaking Bad

You clearly don't know who you're talking to, so let me clue you in. I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger. A guy opens his door and gets shot, and you think that of me?! No! I am the one who knocks!

Christ, you two! All I can say is if I ever get anal polyps, I'll know what to name them.

What I came to realize is that fear, that's the worst enemy. So, get up, get out in the real world and you kick that bastard as hard as you can right in the teeth!

You need to stop focusing on the darkness behind you. The past is the past, nothing can change what we've done.

When we do what we do for good reasons, then we’ve got nothing to worry about. And there’s no better reason... than family.

Take it from me, buddy: It's darkest just before the dawn.

Well, you know how they say, "It's been a pleasure"? It hasn't.

What if this is like math? Or algebra? You know, you add a plus douchebag to a minus douchebag, then you get, like, zero douchebags.

Jesse: "Tell this a-shole if he wants to learn how to make my product, he's got to do it my way, the right way."
Mexican Cook: "I speak English."
Jesse: "So you understand what a-shole means. Now, go get me my phenylacetic acid, a-shole."

What's the point of being an outlaw when you got responsibilities?

Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? Constitution says you do. And so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman and child in this country is innocent. And that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

What did you do? Show your barber a picture of a dog's ass and said, "I'll take that"?

Everyone sounds like Meryl Streep with a gun to their head.

We had a good thing, you stupid son of a b-tch! We had Fring, we had a lab, we had everything we needed, and it all ran like clockwork. You could have shut your mouth, cooked, and made as much money as you ever needed. It was perfect. But no, you just had to blow it up. You, and your pride and your ego. You just had to be the man. If you'd known your place, we'd all be fine right now!

You think I came all this way, just to let something as silly as lung-cancer take me down? Not a chance!

If you don’t know who I am... then maybe your best course would be to tread lightly.

Walt: "How did you find me?"
Saul: "We should talk about that. It should be much, much harder for people to track you down. My PI charged me for three hours, so I seriously doubt it took him more than one."

Saul: "'Cause he gave me the dead mackerel eyes. He meant it."
Walter: "Saul, Mike threatened me. He threatened Jesse. He probably threatened someone before breakfast this morning. It's what he does. Come on, grow a pair!"

Walter: "First order of business is to find a new place to cook. Before anyone says it, no more RVs."
Jesse: "I don’t know, the Crystal Ship did pretty good for us."
Walter: "The Crystal Ship?"
Jesse: "Yeah, that's what I called it."

Now I don’t know what kind of movies you’ve been watching, but even in the real world, we don’t kill 11 people as some kind of prophylactic measure.

Yeah b-tch, Magnets!

Jesse: "What's the point of being an outlaw if I gotta have responsibilities?"
Badger: "Darth Vadar had responsibilities- building the Death Star."
Skinny Pete: "True Dat! Two of 'em, yo!"

Can you walk? Then get the f-ck outta here and never come back.

Last I asked for your help, you said, "I hope you end up buried in a barrel in the Mexican desert."

Skyler, I have lived under the threat of death for a year now, and because of that, I've made choices. I alone should suffer the consequences of those choices, no one else. And those consequences... they're coming. No more prolonging the inevitable.

I’m a blowfish! BLOWFISH! Yeeeah blowfishing this up!

This my own private domicile, and I will not be harassed… b-tch!

If this is supposed to be all, like, Major League and all, we should have equipment maintainer guys. And water boys, you know? "Yo! Gatorade me, b-tch!"

Yeah, Mr. White! Yeah science!

I pay my rent, b-tch! I got civil rights!

You are a wealthy man now. One must learn to be rich. To be poor, anyone can manage

Where'd you get your law degree, Goodman? The same clown college you got that suit?

Jesse, you asked me if I was in the meth business or the money business. Neither. I'm in the empire business.

There's Marie's guy, Dave. She seems really happy with him. Not that Marie's an advertisement for advanced mental health or anything...

In the little village where I was born, life moved at a slower pace yet felt all the richer for it. There, my two uncles were known far and wide for their delicious cooking. They seasoned their zesty chicken using only the freshest herbs and spices. People called them "Los Pollos Hermanos".

I don't know what movies you've been watching but in the real world, we don't kill 11 people as some kind of prophylactic measure.

We're done when I say we're done!

I'm sorry. I must be hearing things. Did you actually just use the word "ethically" in a sentence? You're not Clarence Darrow, Saul. You're a two-bit bus-bench lawyer.

Wanna go stick your wangs in a hornet's nest... it's a free country. But how come I always get sloppy seconds?

Saul: "What'd you tell them?"
Jesse: "I told them they're a couple of d-cks."
Saul: "He's a wordsmith."

All I know is when he tells me that your employer took him out threatening to murder his family, I take notice. Because after all, what am I, if not family?

If your guys had his meeting at KFC you wouldn't immediately assume he's sitting down with Colonel Sanders.

If a mosquito is buzzing around you and it bites you on the ass, you don't go gunning for the attorney. You go grab a fly swatter.

How come you guys always give air freshener. I explicitly say, "no air freshener". And every time, I drive away smelling like an Alpine whorehouse.

Aw, that was so sweet, I think I threw up in my mouth a bit.

Why should we do anything more than once? Should I just smoke this one cigarette? Maybe we should only have sex once, if it's the same thing. Should we just watch one sunset? Or live just one day? It's new every time. Each time is a different experience.

Sometimes you get fixated on something and you might not even get why. You open yourself up and go with the flow, wherever the universe takes you.

If you're committed enough, you can make any story work. I once convinced a woman I was Kevin Costner, and it worked, cecause I believed it!

Did the academy hire you right out of the womb? You guys get younger and younger every year. We have laws, detective, have your kindergarten teacher read them to you.

Clearly his taste in women is the same as his taste in lawyers: Only the very best... with just a right amount of dirty!