Being a billionaire, when you walk into a room, it's like being a woman with a perfect set of tits.BillionairesBobby Axelrod in Billions, Season 1 Episode 1
Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.Men & WomenRita Rudner
My metabolism is all messed up. See, I can moose down a pint of fudge ripple for a midnight snack and wake up having lost weight. Well, everywhere except for my boobs. So annoying.Robin Scherbatsky in How I Met Your Mother, Season 9 Episode 4
Evan: "I heard she got breast reduction surgery."
Seth: "What? That's like slapping God across the face for giving you a beautiful gift."
Back boobs! The visual stimulation of missionary meets the emotional detachment of doggy style... patent pending.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 7 Episode 20
So you're pregnant? Huh, looks like nobody told your boobs.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 7 Episode 12
Barney: "I cannot stop staring at that girl's face."
Ted: "Face, huh? That's your weirdest nickname for boobs yet."
Stella: "Ted, you're staring at my breasts."
Ted: "In fairness... they were staring at me."
Barney: "I met a girl last night. So perky and full of life and not at all fake."
Ted: "You're talking about her boobs, right?"
Barney: "Si. And that wasn't Spanish, that was cup size. What up?!"
Where some choose to look at this bra half-empty, I choose to look at this bra half-full.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 3 Episode 1
Ted, your throwing your life away. This girl is blinding you with her shiny hair and her boob-shaped boobs!Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 2 Episode 18
Barney: "Or it's a chance to mess with her head by showing up with someone hotter. Even better. Triple-threat: hotter and bigger boobs."
Ted: "That's only two?"
Barney: "Count again!"
There are only two reasons to date a girl you've already dated: breast implants.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother