The best Quotes from Bob's Burgers

Bob: "Hey, no nagging my customers!"
Linda: "Don't you yell at my mother!"
Bob: "What's that, Nagatha Christie?"

Bob Belcher - Season 1 Episode 2

I don't appreciate your lack of sarcasm.

Louise Belcher - Season 4 Episode 7

Sarcasm

Turns out dad's been putting murdered cows in our hamburgers.

Louise Belcher - Season 1 Episode 3

Cows

Sorry, I'm saving my spit and blood for my honeymoon.

Louise Belcher - Season 1 Episode 10

Kissing is like a fight with lips.

Louise Belcher - Season 1 Episode 6

Kissing

Listen, you're my children and I love you, but you're all terrible at what you do here and I feel like I should tell you. I'd fire all of you if I could.

Bob Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1

We'll test your meat. If it contains human flesh, anything above the four percent allowable by the FDA, then your restaurant will be closed.

Season 1 Episode 1

Bob: "I can't even satisfy you with my kisses. Sorry, kids."
Gene: "No problem. Thanks for the info."

Gene Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1

Bob: "He looks like a child molester. Louise, don't serve him. Let Gene bring it."
Gene: "Why do I have to get molested?"
Bob: "Because he's not gonna molest you."
Gene: "Why?"
Bob: "You're heavy."

Bob Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1

Fat People

Bob: "There's a line between entertaining and annoying."
Gene: "No! That's a myth."

Gene Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1

Tina: "My crotch is itchy."
Bob: "Okay. Are you telling me as my daughter or as my grill cook? Because my grill cook would never tell me that."

Bob Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1

Daughters

Health Inspector: "Is this your parents' place?"
Louise: "Yes, they're down in the bas*ment grinding the meat right now. That's not a euphemism. They're actually grinding the meat."

Louise Belcher - Season 1 Episode 1