The best Quotes by Billy Burns

Being single's an attitude. The minute you are desperate for a relationship, never gonna find one.

Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

Play hard to get if you want to get him hard again.

Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

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Michael: "Come on. I mean, 50? 50 is so young."
Colin: "People only use '50' and 'so young' in the same sentence at a funeral."

Colin McKenna in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

Age

I prepped your birthday breakfast, but my showing got moved up by an hour, so you'll have to finish without me for the second time today.

Michael Lawson in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

I don't wanna f*ck it up because one of us didn't prepare for the slim possibility of New York City traffic!

Michael Lawson in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

New York City

Michael: "We got robbed. The housekeeper said they took clothes and wine. And what else? A Sonos speaker and Hermès towels that are too nice to actually use."
Suzanne: "Sounds like somebody's havin' a gay yard sale."

Suzanne Prentiss in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

Michael: "I walked into this club. I saw Colin, and I thought...-"
Suzanne: "He's the one!"
Michael: "No, I thought, 'How can I find a way to rub on his ass and look like I'm just dancing?'"

Michael Lawson in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

That is just the cherry on the shit parfait that is my life lately. I went out with that guy I met on Hinge. Suffice it to say, they should rename that app "Unhinged". The psycho ba-tard told me I would be so hot if I lost ten pounds, but I could sit on his face anyway.

Suzanne Prentiss in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

The man leaves you cold, and you buy him a present? What's in there? Brass knuckles to punch you in the face with?

Stanley James in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

I remember Hell's Kitchen when you couldn't walk west of Ninth Avenue without getting knifed. Now it's Chelsea with better gays.

Stanley James in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

New York City

Trust me, you do not wanna be gay and single in this town. At our age, you're invisible.

Stanley James in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

Three vodka sodas, please! What do you guys want?

Michael Lawson in Uncoupled - Season 1

Vodka

Do you have any idea what it's like to be single again for a gay man at my age?

Michael Lawson in Uncoupled - Season 1

Michael: "Hey, birthday boy! Gosh, the tension in your shoulders is off the charts. What's going on?"
Colin: "I took my clothes and some things, and I moved out."

Colin McKenna in Uncoupled - Season 1 Episode 1

Oh, men. Do we love 'em for the d-ck or the date?

Uncoupled - Season 1

God, why are you jumping up at me like that the second I walk in the door? Gives me flashbacks to when I had to raise my children.

Uncoupled - Season 1

Smart women love smart men more than smart men love smart women.

Natalie Portman

Intelligence Men & Women Singles & Dating

It's like the riddle of the Sphinx; why are there so many great unmarried women - and no great unmarried men?

Carrie Bradshaw in Sex And The City - Season 1 Episode 1

Singles & Dating

"There's perfect men around every corner", said God an made the Earth round.

Funny Quotes Singles & Dating

In a town where everyone's dying to couple up, sometimes there's nothing better than being out of a relationship. You have time to do your laundry, freedom to play your favorite bad music really loudly... but the best part of being out of a relationship: Plenty of time to catch up with your friends.

Carrie Bradshaw in Sex And The City - Season 2 Episode 13

Singles & Dating

Tell a man: "I hate you" - you'II have the best sex of your Iife. But tell him: "I Iove you" - you'II probably never see him again.

Samantha Jones in Sex And The City - Season 2 Episode 10

Men Sex Singles & Dating

If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?

Jordan Klepper in The Daily Show

New York Jets

One downside of our big brains is we're the only creatures who are aware that death is inevitable. Although, if you lined ten dogs in a row and shot them one by one, the dog on the end would probably get the gist by about dog four.

Philomena Cunk in Cunk On Life - Episode 1

Brain

Cells couldn't multiply without this, the IKEA instruction manual for life, DNA. DNA is tiny yet comlex, like Tom Cruise.

Philomena Cunk in Cunk On Life - Episode 1

Tom Cruise

The best Quotes by Billy Burns

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