Quote by Berta (about Ex Quotes)

It's a shame, you paying all that money for an ex-wife and an ex-wife's house, and you're not allowed inside either one.

Berta in Two and a half Men - Season 3 Episode 4

You might like these Quotes aswell

Charlie: "Looks to be a beautiful day. Slightly overcast, but that should burn off in a few hours, leaving us with another sun-dappled afternoon in paradise."
Berta: "You still drunk from last night, or did you get a fresh buzz this morning?"

Berta in Two and a half Men - Season 3 Episode 13

Berta in Two and a half Men - Season 2 Episode 8

Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 10 Episode 2

Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 20

Alan: "Why don't you get a vasectomy?"
Charlie: "I've considered it. In fact, a couple of years ago I believe there was a petition circulating."

Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 24

Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 18

Alan: "I feel sorry that your heart has become so hard and small, that you've lost the capacity to connect with another human being on any level any more meaningful, than the inebriated exchange of bodily fluids."
Charlie: "Boy, leave it to you to take a beautiful thing like drunken sex and make it sound dirty."

Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 16

Elliot: "I'm notifying all my old boyfriends today that I'm officially off the market."
Dr. Cox: "I'm sure the 'pulse' setting on your shower head will be devastated!"

Perry Cox in Scrubs - Season 6 Episode 20

Alan: "What are you afraid off?"
Charlie: "I'm afraid I'm gonna hit you so hard, I'll be an only-child."

Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 15

Alan: "Charlie, there's a half naked woman in our kitchen!"
Charlie: "Which half?"

Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 6

Walden: "Money does not buy happiness!"
Alan: "I wouldn't know, I never had either."

Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 1

Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 8

Alan: "You can't stay here alone."
Jake: "Why not?"
Alan: "You know why not."
Jake: "But you don't have a turtle to put in the microwave anymore."

Jake Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 11

Alan: "We judge a person by what's inside and not by what they wear."
Jake: "Lucky for you, huh?"

Jake Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 11

Judith: "I'm very concerned, he's just a child. I don't know if he can deal with this."
Charlie: "Give your son some credit, he's an incredible kid."
Judith: "I was talking about you!"

Judith Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 3

Jordan Klepper in The Daily Show