


No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kids with fake IDs.
Homer Simpson in The Simpsons, Season 8 Episode 10All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.
Alcohol, BrainHomer Simpson in The SimpsonsOn victory, you deserve beer.
On defeat, you need it.
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achille's heel, if you will.
Homer Simpson in The SimpsonsIn heaven there's no beer, so let's just drink it here.
UnknownWithout question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.
Dave BerryA quart of ale is a dish for a king.
William ShakespeareArthur: "109? The hell's in that beer, huh?"
David: "Pure joy in every single drop, man."
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Nuclear WeaponsFrank ZappaYou know what is better than drinking a beer? Brewing your own beer. And then drinking it. And then... Drinking another beer. And then, punching somebody in the snout! That's what!
Chen Stormstout in World of Warcraft, Mists of PandariaIf I have a near-beer, I'm near beer. And if I'm near beer, I'm close to tequila. And if I'm close to tequila, I'm adjacent to cocaine.
Tequila, CocaineCraig FergusonWho am I, why am I here? Forget the question, someone give me another beer!
Meat LoafI hate wine. I like beer!
Rex Ryan"Oh, about beer I never lie," Crandall said. "A man who lies about beer makes enemies."
Stephen King in Pet SemataryThe first sip of beer on a hot day is like that first finger-dip when you open a new jar of peanut butter.
Harlan Coben in The WoodsBeer. Now there's a temporary solution.
Dan CastellanetaFing champagne - where's the beer?
Ander Muñoz in Élite, Season 1 Episode 1My goal is to hit the gym every day I'm on vacation. Usually I just end up sleeping and drinking beer.
Gary AllanPaintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
Billy CarterSome people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
ChampagneDwight D. EisenhowerThere is no such thing as a bad beer. It's that some taste better than others.
Billy CarterLet a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer's day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented.
Gilbert Keith ChestertonBeer, it's the best damn drink in the world.
Jack NicholsonGive a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime!
Bill OwenI have respect for beer.
Russell CroweThe only problem is, Budweiser is one of FIFA's key sponsors. And they sell a product they reflexivly insist on calling "beer".
Soccer World Championship 2014, FIFA AssociationJohn Oliver (Last Week Tonight), World Cup ExcitementHe is a wise man who invented beer.
PlatonBeer is amazing. Nutritional. Medicinal. A beverage, but also a meal.
J. R. MoehringerGod made beer because he loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin